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People who are on Facebook have an email to log in, so you can just email your friends who have an Facebook account.
Unless someone with a Facebook account used your email address to set up their account, no, you cannot get Facebook notifications.
Contact them from the homepage.
You can send AOL email to Facebook by linking the accounts. When you link your accounts you will see your AOL contacts on Facebook. You can send an AOL email to someone's Facebook email address and it will go to the Facebook message application.
Go to your email (that you had signed up with) and there should be an email from Facebook with a link to confirm your account.