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I agree- don't contact the mistress. There's nothing good that can come of it. Maintain your dignity; don't become the next Jerry Springer guest.

However, with regards to this so-called "Woman's Code."

What kind of woman turns marriage into a cage? I know there are men out there who cheat no matter what the state of their marriage, no matter how wonderful a wife they have...but let's get off our high horses, WOMEN. To those women who have taken their husbands for granted, who've decided that sex is just an imposition to them that they don't wish to accede to...what kind of a woman are YOU? If you're married to a man, and they ask you to change things, if they tell you what they need, if they beg you to give them the things they need to feel, affection, respect, appreciation...and you refuse, for years on end...If you refuse to look at yourself, if you refuse to seek help from a marital counselor or a sex therapist with him, what do you expect will happen?

If you refuse someone food or water, is it their fault for finding somewhere else to eat and drink? Or should they die or starvation? I told this starving man yes, despite my reservations about getting involved with a married man. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made.

To my mind, I stole nothing. She'd left her husband out on the curb, with the garbage. Her neglected trash has become my one-in-a-million treasure.

Screw this "Woman's Code." It's just a pile of garbage to keep neglectful wives feeling as if they have some sort of moral high ground they don't deserve.


"Hi..this is where I differ from the other answers.... First! Lets face this fact: It comes right down to this decision: A man can stray, a man can look, a man can touch, a man can.... BUT it is the WOMAN - who can say NO - It is a WOMAN that can BE A WOMAN TO STOP & SEND the Man back home to face being a MAN!!! I am just a believer that a Woman can start it and a Woman can stop it!! And if shes from the same cloth or code of MOST ALL WOMEN then I would have No Problem to have a chat with the Lady? But just be prepared....But if it will make you feel better to confront her then go for it!!!!Be a Woman!!"

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โˆ™ 2008-11-21 10:25:18
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Q: Should you confront your husband's mistress?
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What to tell your husbands mistress?

Don't tell the mistress anything; tell the husband! Husbands can say 'no.' You are enabling his behavior by putting up with him having this mistress. As fearful and heart-breaking as it is you are in control of your life so sit down with him and let him know it's either you or her, but you're not sharing.

Can you sue your husbands mistress in AZ?

Your husband's mistress does not have a contract with you. Rather, she is a citizen who was no doubt told by your husband that he was leaving you. If anyone had a suit, she might have one against him. For that matter, you have one against him, also. A divorce is a civil suit.

My mother in law still has a close relationship with my husbands ex I think she wishes his ex was her daughter in law How do I confront her?

There is only one thing to do when felling like this. You can just be the best you can and if it gets to bad you can just try telling her how you feel.

Should you respond to email from husbands mistress?

Depends on what the email said. You should talk to your husband. The mistress would have to be really backed into a corner to write to you..... possibly if the husband was messing with the other womans head and telling her he didn't know how to tell his wife he was leaving (or couldn't do it). Most mistress' want the wife to know, because they would want to know if it was their husband doing it to them. She probably thought she was ready for you (the wife) to find out..... but I'm betting after she sent that email she regretted it and wished she hadn't sent it. Personally I'd write back a VERY short reply, something along the lines of "got your email, will discuss this with husband, please do not email me again." ANSWER: If it was me and my case is a bit different, I will confront the other woman from the email she send to my husband. But I will talk top him first and see if there's something he needs to tell me, and this depends on if I don't have no clue that his having an affair. Knowing how long we've been married, I will know if he is lying to me or not. And if I discovered that his been cheating on me, then I will demand for him to answer the email he have from his mistress in front of me. Knowing his already on a hot seat with me, it will be I who will tell him what to write so there's no such things as clue or warning that I find out. But don't take my words for it, this is what I will do if it was me.

Do most husbands leave wives for mistress?

NO. They usually do NOT leave their wives. I think it's something like 3% of women who actually get to have a relationship with a man who leaves his wife. Men will often keep 'the other woman' stringing along for YEARS, lying and making promises that they know full well they will never keep. They want to have their cake and eat it too, so they will keep a mistress along for as long as she will put up with it.

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What to tell your husbands mistress?

Don't tell the mistress anything; tell the husband! Husbands can say 'no.' You are enabling his behavior by putting up with him having this mistress. As fearful and heart-breaking as it is you are in control of your life so sit down with him and let him know it's either you or her, but you're not sharing.

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Ever heard of alienation of affection? A wife can sue the husbands mistress if mistress knowingly has an affair with your husband knowing he is married.

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Almost a year ago....

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