What are the lyrics to the Spliced theme song?

Answer 1

The Lyrics

On a tiny little island in the ocean called Pacific

There's a mixed-up group of creatures who are really quite horrific

Stitched together with whatever crap/that* was found or could be grabbed,

Re-invented in the bowels of a lab.

Spliced! They have all been spliced;

Half baked and diced

And regurgitated

By some crazy doctor (Spliced!)

Who went vamoose

And now you'll pay the price -- They have all

Bits of hippo, chunks of llama,

Swap the hind legs for an udder

Splice a parakeet with donkey feet

And season it with butter.

It's no ordinary island, do we have to say it twice,

It's no ordinary island 'cause they're spliced, spliced, spliced!

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* Crap vs. That

There is a debate over whether the word in the third line of the first stanza is "that" or "crap."

Evidence in favor of it being "crap:"

• A careful listening of the word, especially when stretched to two to three times its original length, indicates that the word begins with the "c" sound, transitions into an "r," and then ends with a plosive "p"
• Through the entire theme song, the visual very closely matches what's being said, and when the word in question comes up, the image on screen is a wheelbarrow full of what appears to be manure (i.e. "crap").

Evidence in favor of it being "that:"

• The closed-captioning states "that"
• "Spliced!" is a kid-friendly show (airing on ABC3, which is aimed at children)

Answer 2

On a tiny little island in a place called the Pacific

live a mixed-up bunch of creatures who are really quite horrific

Stitched together with whatever that was found or could be grabbed

Reinvented in the bowels of a lab...

Spliced

They have all been spliced

Half-baked and diced

And regurgitated

By some crazy doctor (Splice!)

Who went vamoose

And now you'll pay the price

They have all...

Bits of hippo, chunks of llama

Swiped a hydras for an udder

Splice a parakeet with donkey feet

and season it with butter

It's no ordinary island

Do we have to say it twice?

It's no ordinary island 'cuz they're spliced

Spliced

Spliced!