How can I overcome my fear so that I can kiss my girlfriend or boyfriend?

Answer 1

Nervousness and fear are actually good emotions that keep us from doing stupid things. If you are nervous about kissing someone for the first time, then it is probably not time for you to kiss them yet. Focus on getting to know each other and try to be honest about who you are with them. I'll illustrate this a bit so that it makes more sense.

Imagine you've thought a girl or boy was really attractive and you finally got up the courage to ask them on a date. The date goes well enough and you've watched a movie and gotten Hamburgers. Over dinner, you learned that he or she loves to play Video Games in his/her spare time but that he or she also spends a lot of time practicing to get better at tennis. He or she seems like a nice person that is interested in what you have to say, is kind and considerate of others, and isn't obnoxious or needy. You really like this person and you can feel that he or she really likes you. This might be a date that should end in a first kiss. In this case - especially if you are young and sex is not on the table for a first date (or not at all) - it doesn't have to be passionate. A kiss should be an expression of two people's affection and not a ritual that people are just going through because they want to label themselves as a couple. If you are both feeling it, then you simply have to summon the courage and go for it. If your fear is greater than your courage then you either don't want it enough (which is fine), or you aren't comfortable enough. As you become more comfortable, your fear of rejection will grow smaller and smaller, so you'll need less courage. Also, your girlfriend or boyfriend might summon up the courage before you do and then you have no problem anyway!

Now imagine that your date didn't go as well. You found out that your date is into things you don't really enjoy and he or she was hateful to the waiter. Your date gossiped about other people at school in a mean and hateful way, and he or she just seemed very critical and unkind. In this case, you would probably dislike this person, but you might still find him or her attractive and want to experiment with kissing. If this is the case, simply go for it. The worst thing that can happen is that they'll stop you, and you'll have an easy excuse not to call them again.