The first time you see him is at the Lake of Rage, after you battle and/or capture the Red Gyarados (which, as a side note, i sadly made faint) he is on the shore and he asks if you could investigate this interference (Gyarados are not red, the radio waves made this happen, by the way) and you go to the "souvenier shop" and he finds a secret way to TEAM ROCKET (eek), and you go and help him. When you are done, the next time you see him is when you discover he is the Elite Four Champion (At Indigo Plateau, in Kanto, After you have all 8 badges and go on a quest to find (Soulsilver is Lugia, Heartgold is Ho-oh))
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You meet Lance in Pokemon SoulSilver at the Lake of Rage, where he is investigating strange disturbances in the Pokemon, after you catch or defeat Shiny Red Gyrados, you and him team up and defeat the Team Rocket group who is hiding in the "Souvenier Shop".
The gym leaders have different Pokemon the elite 4 and Lance.
You can beat the Elite Four again, and battle Red again. If you beat lance and the elite four and Lance again then you are able to face Red at mt silver.
no you can trade soulsilver pokemon to black
you get a ticket on the s.s. boat to veridian city then you have to beat all 6 kanto gym leaders Then face RED (ash)