Each server as its own set of commands. There is not a list of all commands available as they are different from server to server. If you want to know the commands you can use on a single player world, just use /help you the list.
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Minecraft commands were first seen in bukkit server. We do not know when the first commands were made for bukkit servers however
You can't have commands on minecraft classic but you can in multiplayer classic
In multiplayer, commands are generally started with a "/" Single player commands have not yet been added, unless you get a mod that has commands, like WorldEdit. They will be added in the next update, 1.3.
In minecraft survival you can just take any land but in servers you might have to use commands.
Delete the bin folder in the .minecraft folder, start Minecraft, and it will say that it's updating. Let it update, then install all of the mods over again, but don't install the one(s) that you don't want.