Hogsmead is a wizarding village close to Hogwarts School.
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Your first step should be to make sure you've got your acceptance letter, your supplies, and your ticket for platform 9 and 3/4. Assuming you've have all this, you'll need to go to Kings Cross Station in London England. Once you get through customs and everything, you'll need to get to this station before 11:00a.m (GMT). If you miss this deadline, the barrier will have sealed and you'll need to go to the Leaky Cauldron for assistance. Once you get your luggage on a trolley, proceed to the area where platform 9 turns over to platform 10. You'll want to stand in front of platform 9, near platform 9-8. Now, you'll need to check and make sure no muggles (non magic folk) are watching. Once the area is all clear, proceed to run directly at the wall in front of you. Now, if you didn't miss the train and splatter your brains (old wizard humor from back in the day), you'll find yourself in front of the Hogwarts Express. Give your ticket to the conductor and leave your luggage for the luggage taker to apparate your luggage to Hogwarts. Lastly, remember you're allowed to bring a small bag, purse, or suitcase on the Hogwarts Express. You may also bring your pet into your cabin. Now, we'll begin rolling into Hogsmead Station at about 6:00, you'll want to be in your robes by this time. Once we arrive, if you're a first year you'll travel with Hagrid on the boats to the castle. If you're a second year up, you'll take the carriages. Rain, Snow, Sleet, Murderous Dragon Fire, the carriages go through it all. The boats take about 30 minutes to travel to the castle and the trestles can get you here in about 10.
Yes.Theme songHermione: Where's Harry?Ron: I don't know, I can't feel when he's not around.Hermione: I hope he gets back soon so we can play wizards' Sudoku or something.Harry: Oh my god, look what I found!Ron: Is that a book?Hermione: I know a thing or two about books, and that's a book.Harry: It's not just any book, guys.Ron: Is it a Young-Adult-Vampire-Romance novel?Ten seconds laterHarry: Anyway, I just happened to find this book in Snape's bedroom in a locked trunk under his bed. It's his diary!Ron: Whoa, shall we read it?Harry: I've got a better idea. Let's read it!Hermione: Oh, what a fascinating character study this'll be!Harry: Okay, this is the first entry: Dear Diary…Snape: Today I ate some oatmeal for my breakfast. It was flavorless and watery. It reminded me of my mother. I cried.Ron: I'm hungry.Harry: What else is new, fatty? Let's get to the good stuff…Snape: Today I put on my raincoat and traveled to Knockturn Alley. I purchased a pair of fancy mice. When I brought them home, one devoured the other and then died of loneliness. I felt envy.Harry: This is hilarious!Hermione: Oh look Harry, I see your name!Ron: Ooh, you're good at reading, Hermione-Harry: What?!Snape: Today that Potter boy showed me his middle finger. When I attempted to punish him with detention, he shoved me into a wall screaming, "bother, bother!" over and over. Later he and his orange friend repeated the vile attack until I lost consciousness. Tonight I prayed for the first time in twenty years. I prayed for the end.Harry: I remember that, Ron! Give me five!Ron: You already took my money, Harry.Harry: Never mind.Snape: I lost a button on my cloak today. Minerva pointed it out in front of the entire faculty. Oh, cruel attention…Button, oh button, oh where hath thou fled?Did thee tarry too long amongst fabric and thread?Did thee role off my bosom and ceased to exist?How I wish I could follow thee, into the mist…Ron: What is a bosom, Harry?Harry: Umm…Hermione: Yeah, tell him, Harry.Harry: Oh look, another page.Snape: Today, while in the bath tub…(Harry, Ron and Hermione): Ew!Snape: …I fell asleep and had a nightmare. I was riding a thestral through a thunder storm. Every thunder clap resolved into… their voices. 'bother, bother…' suddenly, it became music. I was at the Yule ball with Lily Evans. I asked her to dance; she asked me to die. Would that I could, Lily; Would that I could…Harry: My mom was awesome!Snape: …when I awoke, my skin was prune-like from the tepid bath water. And I was late for golf with Lucius Malfoy.Ron: Mm, I like prunes!Dumbledore: Did somebody say prunes?Ron: I said prunes! How did he know?Dumbledore: What are you monkeys up to, studying for class?Harry: No, we're invading Professor Snape's privacy by reading his personal diary which we stole from his room.Dumbledore: But you don't have any prunes, do ya'?Harry: I'm afraid not.Dumbledore: I am very disappointed then you, Harry.Harry: Okay, back to the stinky book!Snape: Today the orange-one accidentally drank one of my more expensive elixirs. He promptly vomited a glittery rainbow of foul waist. The classroom erupted with applause, triggering my migraine. I aborted the class and was left to clean the boy's sick. Half way through Argus Filch showed up and bragged about his many affairs with Hogsmead bar-maids. Then he told me I smelled of broccoli and left without wishing me a happy birthday. Later I noticed my bottle of sangria was gone. I settled for a cup of coffee, scolding my writing-hand at the process and spilling it on my pants. I walked to the hospital wing, covering my wet spot with a book. Madam Pomfrey laughed at me and made me wait while she treated a student's runny nose. After an hour it became apparent that she had forgotten about me, so I returned to my room and found that I had locked myself out. I called for Filch, who turned up covered in lipstick and clearly having finished the sangria; he broke open my door and laughed at me, punched me in the shoulder to hard and left me alone. I thought of my father. I cried.Harry: This has gotten boring. Let's write a new entry!Ron: That's a really fun idea!Hermione: Here's one of the quills that I carry with me at all times!Harry: Okay. I am Snape. I'm so sad because I poop my pants all the time. I don't have any friends because I stink like broccoli and poop. I teach potions to Harry Potter and it's really boring 'cause he's so cool, and makes me have depression. Okay, I think I'll go cry now, but not before I poop my pants. Bye.Ron: Ha ha! Can I try?Harry: Be my guest!Ron: I… am… S…Hermione: Okay, Ron, that was a good try.Snape: (walks in)Snape: Hm… somebody knocked me unconscious and ransacked my room… hey wait a minute, that book! What are you doing?!Harry: Snape, Ron stole your diary!Snape: What?! You didn't read it, did you?Harry: Oh, he read it alright. He read it all!Snape: This is unacceptable!Ron: I liked the story about the button, Snape.Snape: You… you did?Ron: It made me sad, thinking about that little button, lost and alone… I hope you find your button, Snape.Snape: So do I, orange-one, so do I…Ron: I like buttons!