What is the difference between hope and expectation?

Answer 1

HOPE: Hope is desire that things go well. It is to want good for yourself and others. This is a desireable (and probably essential) part of our emotional health. Our ability to feel hope can be directly influenced by our bad decisions. One who repeatedly makes poor decisions may begin to lose hope as they see how the consequences of their actions affect their future possibilities to receive desireable outcomes.

EXPECTATION: Entirely different, but co-related, is the idea of expectations.

To expect something to happen is actually a misguided and unrealistic "demand" or "command" issued to the cosmos that things better go your way, or else you're going to smash something (excuse my jest). Expectations have no place in an emotionally healthy person. I cite the following proofs, so that my meaning is not misunderstood.

A) I hope my wife, my kids and I live a long, healthy life. However, it is unrealistic to presume (or expect) that nothing will go wrong ever in the lives of those I love. I gain more positive emotional health and stability from cherishing my life with them knowing that the (at least mortal) near-future is uncertain, than by expecting the universe or chance (or God, if I am religiously inclined) to give it to me on demand.

B) Expectations lead to disappointment and dispair.

--1 If I study for a test and expect to do well, there are 2 possible outcomes.

----a) If I do well, I am pleased.

----b) If I do poorly, I am disappointed and FRUSTRATED.

Oppositely,

--2) if I study for a test and just "hope" to do well, then there are also 2 possible outcomes.

----a) I will either do well, and be grateful and pleased, or

----b) I will do poorly and recognized that my preparation was insufficient. I will NOT FEEL FRUSTRATED. I will see my grade as a result of natural consequences, not as a secret combination of the universe set on destroying me.

In these two cases, the first provides 1 good and 1 poor outcome. In the second, both are positive for the person because they DO NOT FEEL THEY HAVE LOST SOMETHING. They never anticipated that the future was going to give it to them in the first place. That sense of loss is what we call despair or disappointment.

May we all hope for the best, put our best foot forward in making it happen, but cherish all that we have, recognizing that perfection will not be attained in this imperfect world, nor will we ever be able to see the "unseen" future.

p.s. In this treatise we are speaking of expectations of ourselves and our uncontrolable circumstances, not of our expectations of another person like a parent/teacher may set for a child/student. In a supervisory capacity this use of the word "expectation" doesn't mean the same thing. It expresses either

1) our estimation of another's likelihood to do something (I expect you'll want the $100 I promised you) or

2) the word expectation could mean that I am giving you a command that comes with a consequence if ignored (I expect you to be home by 11pm). This case is more like a series of laws and consequences were we delineate the positive or negative outcomes of good or bad behavior than it is an actual proper use of the word.