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in 1940 there is an untold story about what really was the reason the japs bombed pearl harbor the japs were making laser cats lasers came out of their mouths and bombs out of their butts this was covered up by FDR for years but soon the cat wars will be upon us so lock your doors and keep ur cats away from the Japs and the bombs that the Japs used were the fattest cats that they turned into bombs this was called operation fatboy dont think im crazy because it's the truth so run and the best way to avoid this is to stuff your walls with catnip its the best protection so now u can be afraid of the dark this is your friendly neighborhood hobo telling you good day
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