Probably not, the person under most U.S. state laws would not be considered a spouse if they were not legally married. There are a few states that still recognize common law marriages. However, the qualifications for such a union are established by the laws of those states and can be quite complicated.
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Maybe, if the affair involves cohabitation or some other form of significant financial support. Spousal support is typically limited to the time required for the ex-spouse to become self-supporting.
She is committing adultery and involving her children. It is unlikely the court would support her actions while she is still married. The court may award custody to their father. She should file for divorce if she wants child support.
No. Marriage constitutes the emancipation of a minor and child support obligations cease.
The obligor should file a petition/motion to terminate maintenance.
You will have to pay child support only after paternity has been established either by presumption (i.e., you two were married at the time), your acknowledgment or genetic testing.