Your girlfriend is no longer turned on by you and you need to know how to turn her on or you may not make it you love each other a lot HELP. how do i do this?

Answer 1

Maybe you should try new things, go on different dates, see new movies and try to talk to her about what she wants. Try to find out what pleases her. (WRITER OF THE QUESTION)we are each others first actually loves and neither of our rents like us to go anywhere but our houses yet so when we go to my dads we get sexual but this last time she didn't even do anything for her she just got me off repeatedly. ALL CLOTHES ON ALL THE TIME() Did she say she is no longer turned on by you? Or are you just presuming that because she didn't get off herself? She may have been feeling extra generous that time and just wanted you to be happy at her own expense. She might be having some doubts about getting into sex herself, but is OK with you getting off. There are lots of possibilities. You should talk to her about it. Talking is good. You just might find you were worrying about nothing.

Sorry, but there is no magic button to push to make this happen, however, you may be surprised that to "turn her on" you actually have to change something about yourself. Specifically you have to create the tension that will result in sexual tension and make her want you - to "turn her on". The answer is soooo simple yet if 1000 men read this only a few would actually be successful at it because it is so simple it is a difficult mindset to accomplish and preserve in everyday life: be a man and don't be a wussy. Let me explain... Sometimes with women, what you need to do is the exact opposite of what your instincts tell you to do. As men, we were raised to be "nice guys" but if you want to get physical you need to learn how to be a man and sometimes to be a 'bad boy'. This is not a "method" or a "system"... but rather think of this as something inside you that you need to recognize. Put simply, you need to 'be a man' to CREATE the physical attraction. Men tend to have a sexual reaction to visual or sensual (touching) stimulus while women tend to react sexually (be turned on) thru tension and emotion, and you actually have the power to create that tension. To 'be a man' is to be calm, cool, collected... if you appear to always be worried about whether or not you can "turn her on" or about a sexual experience that may or may not happen, then just the fact that you are worried will cause her to put her guard up. And you need to be able to take it a step further, you literally need to be able to spend time with her and not expect anything, not anticipate that you will have sex... you actually have a better chance than if you are sitting there all worried about it or worse yet, tell her that you are worried about not being physical (major walls will go up around her if you do that). Be witty, with a sexual undertone to remind her that you are a man... for example, don't bring up the next date of your next time together, wait for her to bring it up, then when she does, say (in a coy kinda way) 'ahhh, I see, you just can't wait to get me alone so you can get your hands all over me... I've got you figured out', what you just did there is you were witty, you were calm and relaxed, you weren't needy, you reminded her that you are a man and she is a woman, and you put ideas into her head. To make it better, don't wait for her reaction, just say something like... 'ok... 7pm at my house then, but don't think that I'm easy and I'll put out" (but don't be so serious, maybe wink at her after you way it and then walk away, she will know you are joking) and then have somewhere you have to go... the last think you told her will make her dwell about it and start to drive her crazy... even if she seams a little mad right away. I won't lie, not every girl will like this and not every girl will react to this, and it works best if you are already dating which you appear to be, but if she doesn't like this then chances are she already doesn't want to be physical with you, if she does like this it is because she has already thought about being physical with you and you just helped create the tension she needed to act upon it, so in my opinion you have nothing to loose if you want her to act. Sounds like she is already doing things to you, so you are doing something right, but I would guess that you are asking her to take it further. The best thi ng you could do when she is doing something to you is to not beg or ask, especially if she isn't experienced, she is probably very scared and you have no idea how incredible it would be to have her want you to have her vs you taking her into doing it. It will take time but you have to be patient and wait for her to want it. Help her to build the tension and it will happen. Don't apologize for yourself all the time, or ask her constantly 'are you ok?' 'did I do something wrong?' 'do you like me?' 'did you like that?' because if you do, all you are doing is subconsciously making her ask herself those questions 5 times for every once you ask her and she will put a wall up. Basically, don't be a wussy, think more like a 'bad-boy'... but you can do it without the leather jacket and motorcycle [although it can help :) I know from experience but I got them cuz I like 'em and learned quickly what a girl looks like when she looks at a guy and thinks 'there is a man' ]. The less you act needy like you just have to be with her, the more she will want to be with you. Think of all the cool Romantic Movies you've seen where a girl is with one guy who is whiny and controlling, and she falls for a 'bad boy' guy who is calm and relaxed and then she leaves the whiney guy for the 'bad boy'. To get to the sex, you have to create tension. NEVER let things get boring on a date or in discussions. If you don't have something good to say then don't say anything. And sometimes, the best way to make her think about you is to not be around her, if you are around her all the time you start to appear clingy. If the situation looks like it is going to be difficult for the physical part to happen, then forget about it and act like it is no big deal, ACT like 'it was no big deal but I know you want me'... act like that but don't say it like that. I KNOW this has got to be very difficult to think about doing, it sounds like you are young and new to sex. I figured all this out the hard way by maturing into it, no one told me about this, I just matured into this by accident in my late teens and now I look back and know that before that I was a wussy. This isn't a system, this is who you are and you just don't know it yet. Some guys never learn how to be a man. Never act jealous, if you feel that way then just get over it. Acting jealous will backfire and push her away. If she is going to be with someone else then she is going to do it anyway, you need to act like you are the catch that she should worry about. Make fun of her sometimes but in a good way, too many guys take this too far but think about how best friends act together... you can still joke around with a girl and make fun of her a little. The other option is to read encylopedias together and order in Pizza. Try this, if she says something weird and stupid, just laugh and say 'you can be such a dork sometimes'. She may scowl at you but don't back down, she is just amazed that you stand up to her. So to wrap up... be a man, don't be wussy, don't be jealous, be witty, be funny, time apart can make her want you more, won't whine about wanting sex, act like she wants you (but be careful about that, don't over do it), be calm, be the alpha male but still be chivalrous (still hold open doors and be a gentleman kinda stuff). :)