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Personality disorders in general are still a point of debate in the psychological world. The problem is that most psychological disorders require a person to be distressed or have trouble functioning in the world in order to be diagnosed. With personality disorders, many people aren't bothered by their "symptoms," and they may be functioning well in their environment. To them, it may seem perfectly normal to act as they do.

It's not uncommon for people with personality disorders to be referred for psychological examination by employers, co-workers, or family. The people may have trouble getting along with the person or see their behavior as being odd. Personality psychology is a fascinating but blurry field; when do a person's personality traits change from normal to dysfunctional? Some psychologists think that people with personality disorders are simply on the extreme side of certain personality traits; they are only labeled mentally ill because they don't fit into society's behavioral norms.

Anyway, the answer to your question is that there's no way to tell for sure. Even a doctor might have trouble making a diagnosis. The best you can do is make your own judgment of whether he is overly narcissistic or not. If he's too self-absorbed for your taste, you probably shouldn't date him. You definitely shouldn't put up with any abusive tendencies (verbal, emotional, or physical) stemming from his narcissistic beliefs. I always look to see how men treat service people (waiters, cashiers, etc.). If he doesn't treat them with respect, it's likely that he won't regard you with respect.

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Q: How do you know if a man is a Narsisstic Personality Disorder when you first date him?
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