In chapter 53 of the manga Kaoru kisses Hikaru on the cheek.
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Hikaru's hair is usually parted to the right (from OUR perspective, but his perspective it's parted to the left) and Kaoru's is usually parted to the left (again, from our perspective. From Kaoru's perspective, it's parted to the right). Also, in the anime, Hikaru's voice is lower, and firmer in the English sub. Kaoru's voice is higher pitched and softer. Also, according to Haruhi, when Kaoru isn't with Hikaru, "he is normal and well behaved, while Hikaru is noisy and has a bad mouth".
Well Hikaru has more of a clear voice and a little more high pitch then Kaoru's. Kaoru has more of a nazley voice and just a little deeper then Hikaru (at times but sometimes Hikaru is depper) . And plus Kaoru is sometimes more of a nicer person then Hikaru (when they are out of middle school) and that's how i tell the difference hope this helped :)
Kaoru and Hikaru both have romantic feelings for Haruhi but Kaoru steps back to let Hikaru come to realize his feelings for Haruhi and encourages Hikaru to pursue his feelings. At least that is what I got from the anime but those reading the manga will have a much better understanding, I would think.
In the manga it is revealed that he does. So does Kaoru, which makes Kaoru and Hikaru have a REAL fight! Afterwards, they make up, but Hikaru dies his hair brown or black i am not sure, so they can be told apart, and it suited him really well too. Kaoru gave up Haruhi for Hikaru, though he still sorta had feelings for her, Hikaru was more important to him. Hunny, Mori, and obviously, Kaoru, was all for Hikaru and Haruhi couple! They all supported him, but Kyoya said he didn't care how it went. Meanwhile, Tamaki is also in love with Haruhi, but he's such an idiot he doesn't know it yet;) In the anime, I wanted Tamaki and Haruhi to be together, but now that they say Hikaru is in love with her, I think he deserves her more and they make SUCH a better couple. Plus Hikaru deserves her more:) EDIT: (SPOILER) Kaoru also confesses his love for Haruhi and kisses her on the cheek in Ch.52. However, in Ch.81/82 Tamaki and Haruhi start confessing their love for each other and kiss! :S
Kaoru is 37 years old (birthdate: February 17, 1974).