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As of October 2011, Theo James has an actress girlfriend. Nothing has been announced to the public stating otherwise.
Theodore Peter James Kinnaird Tapiklis
You don't. You will love him forever.
Theo James has not publicly released his personal email address, and he does not have a fan-mail address. He does, however, have a fan Facebook page, so sending a message to the group or posting on the group's wall might be a good way to show your support.