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Start by reading aloud three chapters of any Shakespearean play while boiling 55 large white eggs. Put on your mama's underwear, and nothing else, while dancing around your vehicle in circles, waving the dipstick in the air. Open the hood to the vehicle. Sacrifice a small animal on the air cleaner. Now you can slide the dipstick into the opening at the end of the transmission dipstick tube. You're done.
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