Is it normal after an abusive relationship to feel as though all your feelings towards him have been destroyed?

Answer 1

It certainly is normal and why would you have any good feelings towards a person that has constantly belittled you, put you down, made you doubt who you are or perhaps hit you over and over again on different occasions. These people need help! I am so very proud of you for getting away from this guy. It took guts! Now, you have the opportunity to seek help for this abuse he bestowed upon you. You can go to a "Women's Center" and receive counselling or go to your local "Mental Health" and they will find you counselling. You have had too long with this abusive person and you need help getting to know who you are again, and learn tools so you will never put up with this behavior again or choose another abusive partner. You are going to feel an empty pit in your stomach, your heart and your soul. You have put a wall of protectiveness up around you and you won't trust any man for awhile. You may even feel you want to strike out at any man you are dating and thus, the cycle of abuse starts all over again. You start abusing yourself! All men are not bad people! If you at least join a group to help with your abuse issues you will eventually fill in those big holes inside of you and one day you'll start to feel like life is really worth living. You are going to meet some nice, kind guy that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Hang in there Marcy

Answer 2

Absolutely. If you're anything like me, you tried and tried to make it work. You've shown your best and worst self just trying to find the love you once had. You wanted it to work with an intense passion. You excused, overlooked and/or accepted horrible things because you had faith that in the end it would all be worth it. You felt the end of the road would make you happy so you strapped in for the ride. But that isn't how it worked out. If it was just going to end, you could have ended it after the FIRST time something unacceptable occurred. Now 'defeat' is what you're left with, feeling like you lost. But that's natural after all (and again, if you're anything like me) I'm sure there were things you lost: respect, hope, a few points in self esteem and confidence etc. But there is a silver lining. You won't feel that way forever. It's a process and you're feeling things you need to feel. You're progressing. Don't worry, it gets better... way better.